I kind of forgot to update this blog, but as the title says, another cycle has come and passed. As usual, I was devastated when Aunt Flo showed up. For the first time ever, I voiced my concerns to my partner - namely that I'm afraid the fertility specialists will tell me I'm sterile and there's nothing we can do. I proceeded to lay my head on his chest and cry in silence for a while. Mr. S was unshaken as usual. He is always so optimistic and adapting. He's saying it's not the end of the world if that happens, there are workarounds. Of course, he's always been okay with having kids or not so its not the same for him as it is for me.
I don't know about the workarounds though... If it came to that, I don't feel like I'd be able to go with adoption at this point.. It's a long and difficult process and I feel I've run out of energy... I've been let down by my fertility. I couldn't take being let down by adoption. Aye...
Anyway, as I said the last time, I was waiting to see if we'd be successful last cycle before I went further. I saw my doctor yesterday and he is referring me to a fertility clinic. I'm hoping it won't be too long before I get a call from them. Most of all, I'm praying whatever issue they find is easily fixed.
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